Fans of The Governator’s 1990 version of “Total Recall” tend to share a common concern with this reboot. They’re worried that an iconic figure from the original will be forgotten in the Colin Farrell version. And no, they’re not worried about cameos from Arnold Schwarzenegger or Sharon Stone.

They’re terrified this “Total Recall” will forget the three-boobed lady. Spoiler alert! She hasn’t been forgotten.

Does anyone really enjoy getting tricked? Maybe someone has a story about getting tricked into receiving, with no strings attached, a fortune. That would be an enjoyable trick. Other than that, though, getting tricked just kind of [filtered word] you off, right?

Kids aren’t secretly hoping you’ll choose “trick!” when they pound on your door on Halloween night. “Trick! No candy here! Like, none. What are you, a ghost? Cute. No, but really, I made sure the whole neighborhood would have zero candy this year. Isn’t that a fun trick? Happy Halloween!”

The boob tube takes a seat on the bench this month (although I’m excited to write about “Cougar Town” next month, no joke). It has to. As my sister recently put it on Facebook: HUNGER GAMESSSSSS

I think I might hate Woody Allen.

Not really sure how else to explain it. I (might) hate Woody Allen. He’s a walking, talking classic. His movies are revered and discussed in college classrooms across the country. There’s a certain amount of prestige that accompanies statements like, “Did you see the new Woody Allen film? I rather enjoyed it.” (You have to say “film” when invoking Allen’s name, not “flick” or “pic”, otherwise you undermine any sense of that prestige.)