What ever happened to the days when a coach would call you into his office, look you in the eye and just ask, “I heard there were (insert team name here, I inserted Petersburg) players at a party last weekend. Were you there?”

And the coach knew you well enough that any misinformation would be obvious.

If you knew anything, you had better be truthful. 

If you were at fault, you had to go out and run around the old dump. 

Our old dump had black bears that had become habituated to eating garbage and watching team rule-breakers run in circles.