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Men must become extra tough to stop violence against women

Walk a Mile In Her Shoes sends message throughout community

Posted: October 15, 2012 - 12:07am
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Two young men begin Saturday's Walk A MIle In Her Shoes fundraiser to help end gender violence, specifically domestic violence and sexual assault against women.
Two young men begin Saturday's Walk A MIle In Her Shoes fundraiser to help end gender violence, specifically domestic violence and sexual assault against women.

Alaska ranks in the top five in the nation for domestic and sexual violence.

Even if it were in the top 50, that still would be too high.

On Saturday, community members came out to reinforce the travesty of that statistic with participation in Walk a Mile In Her Shoes one-mile walk and 5K run, an annual event hosted by AWARE (Aiding Women in Abuse and Rape Emergencies), Juneau Violence Prevention Coalition and Southeast Alaska Board of Realtors.

“Walk a Mile In Her Shoes is an international march to end gender violence,” AWARE Community Engagement Advocate Mark Calvert said. “It takes place in conjunction with the Juneau White Ribbon Pledge Drive. We have gathered over 1,000 White Ribbon Pledges from Juneau men and boys to never commit, condone or remain silent about violence against women and girls.”

Saturday event participants discovered it is extra tough to walk in high heels, but that uncomfortable feeling pales before the degrading and wicked acts of abuse.

“I am in so much pain I can’t think,” Matt Armstrong, a social worker for Juneau Youth Services, said, “I just want to support women and put an end to domestic violence. This is a great cause and it needs to happen. I hope I am a role model to the young men in this city and encourage them to be successful adults and good community advocates.”

Armstrong finished the walk with Juneau-Douglas High School junior Vlad Altman who wore xtraTufs.

Dzantik’i Heeni sixth grader Eli Douglas, still rubbing the sleep from his eyes after a commute into Douglas, wore shoes that would bring ridicule if donned among his Wolverine classmates.

“I wanted to support the cause,” Douglas said as he hobbled along the walking route. “And I wanted to help raise money for the cause. I think this is a powerful thing we are doing today.”

Young men were in abundance as local high school sports teams, including the Thunder Mountain and Juneau-Douglas basketball teams and the JDHS cross country team, either ran the 5K portion for the cause or slipped hairy toes into uncomfortable high heels to walk the mile.

“Our guys need to be aware of domestic violence and the issues surrounding it,” JDHS boys basketball coach Robert Casperson said. “Mark (Calvert) and I have been talking about doing the Coaching Boys Into Men and we discussed this as an opportunity to get our guys out into the community and support those efforts.”

Casperson said he has admired the work TMHS coach John Blasco has done in the Coaching Boys Into Men program. That sentiment was echoed by Calvert.

“John and his team have done incredible work,” Calvert said. “They have really raised awareness of gender violence and have gotten other boys and men in Juneau motivated. Look at this turnout today and it is very special to see men and boys in Juneau actually getting involved in ending gender violence and promoting gender equality.”

Along with Casperson, JDHS cross country coaches Tristan Knutson-Lombardo and Merry Ellefsen have now partnered with Coaching Boys Into Men.

JDHS cross-country freshmen Harrison Bibb and Duncan Smith finished the walk arm-in-arm supporting each other — literally — as well as women. Junior teammate Malik Brown and sophomore Riley Moser actually ran in borrowed high heels.

“It is super fun,” Moser said in anguish. “And we want to show that JDHS contributes and we are against women being hurt.”

Added Brown, “I feel like this is the least we can do for women. This hurt walking in these high heels but the whole time I was thinking that I can do this to stop domestic violence, it is worth it.”

Opting to wear flats instead of high heels in the walk, Errol Champion and Jim Preston, President and President-Elect of the Southeast Board of Realtors, finished in grand stride.

“It is a good, worthy cause,” Preston said. “We support this so here we are.”

Southeast Board of Realtors member Mimi Rothchild stated that realtors’ jobs are to help create healthy communities and this event is a starting point.

“People can come together and educate from very young ages,” Rothchild said. “Realtors aren’t just about selling houses, we are about strong communities. If we are going to stop violence against women we are going to need to start young and educate young men and boys to show that even if this is not what they see in their home, we are respecting women of all ages.”

In 2011 the Alaska Council on Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault (CDVSA) conducted a statewide survey to determine how many women have been victimized. This information was formulated into snapshots of each community (http://justice.uaa.alaska.edu/research/2010/1103.victimization/1103.023....).

For Juneau alone the results are staggering.

Out of every 100 adult women residing in the City and Borough of Juneau, 47 have experienced intimate partner violence; 35 have experienced sexual violence; and 55 have experienced intimate partner violence, sexual violence, or both.

The national rate is 25 percent. Juneau’s local rate shows this has become an epidemic in the Capital City.

601 adult Juneau women were called at random for this study. The survey excluded non-English speaking women, women without phone access, and women not living in a residence (i.e., homeless women).

“At the heart of why we are working so hard to bring men into this movement to end domestic violence and sexual assault is that we believe most men are good and do not perpetrate violence,” Calvert said. “These are the men we are mobilizing. It is not enough for men to say, ‘I’m not going to commit violence against women.’ Men have to speak up when other men perpetrate violence and display sexist behavior that objectifies women and girls. When we say nothing and do nothing we are saying ‘It is just fine to be violent against women and girls.’ We are making great strides in Juneau, and today was a beautiful example of that.”

Sisters Eda and Eva Meyer, too young to understand what Saturday’s walk was about, observed multiple runners wearing costume wings run past them.

“Look,” Eda exclaimed. “Angels.”

(Editors note: Sponsorship and help for Saturday’s Walk A Mile In Her Shoes included SE Road Runners, Costco, Heritage, The Rookery, Alaska Club, Pavitt’s, and Nugget Alaskan Outfitter).

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alaskangirlygirl
434
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alaskangirlygirl 10/15/12 - 07:46 am
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It's Errol...

It's Errol Champion and not Earl.

Latitude58
14400
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Latitude58 10/15/12 - 07:54 am
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Gret picture!

Kinky Boots!

swimmergirl
4368
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swimmergirl 10/15/12 - 09:02 am
2
4

Kudos all around!

What an excellent idea for this event! A little goofy and fun, but the theme, and actually walking in high heels, a very, very good experience for the guys to have.

Extra special thanks for Robert and John and all the Jr/HS boys who showed up!! What a great learning opportunity for these young men for themselves, and as future leaders in their community. Way to go!

snagger
8248
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snagger 10/15/12 - 09:51 am
7
3

Sexual .....

It's too bad this program uses this concept. The women I associate with would never walk a mile in those shoes!!

kpawsuh
10138
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kpawsuh 10/15/12 - 11:17 am
6
5

OK, I'm sorry, but I can't

OK, I'm sorry, but I can't say anything but what a stupid event! It really doesn't work like that. "I'm gonna go home and beat the crud out of my wife! Wait, I remember walking a mile in high heals...Guess I'll go buy her roses instead" All this "Highlighting awareness" BS! Just teach basic respect for all living creatures! You want a fundraiser for the aware shelter, great, but don't act like it is some great social program as it really isnt. No one walked out of there learning anything other than fashion is stupid. No one should wear those shoes!

AlaskanStyle
1410
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AlaskanStyle 10/15/12 - 11:39 am
4
6

if you cant say anything then

if you cant say anything then why say it ? its not like you have fan's on the Juneau Empire waiting on pins and needles for your pessimistic opinion.

triadef
344
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triadef 10/15/12 - 11:59 am
2
3

Great idea!

Great idea!

kpawsuh
10138
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kpawsuh 10/15/12 - 12:15 pm
4
2

Hey whatever style. I just

Hey whatever style. I just get tired of all these feel good things that make you think your doing something but in reality do absolutely nothing, or even make it worse. But go put your pumps on and run around. I'm sure some wife beater is shaking in his boots at the thought of it. (from laughter)

swimmergirl
4368
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swimmergirl 10/15/12 - 12:22 pm
1
3

Some folks are all rain.....

....must be a very unhappy existence. Snagger I'll ignore as a usual 'negative nanny'.

Kpawsuh - of course it doesn't work like that - you think men would show up if the event was "come on down, we'll smack you around a little and then grab you inappropriately"?
Of course not. As a more lighthearted 'hook' - it is a pretty striking metaphor, and I think the best part is the involvement of the kids - the idea that the coaches of our young men are taking the opportunity to be (perhaps the only) positive adult male role-models is excellent. If more young men become aware or are mentored, and even a few of them either learn not to abuse their female partners, or speak up against such abuse when they see it among their peers, then the event is a success in my book.

About Coaching Boys Into Men:
http://www.futureswithoutviolence.org/content/features/detail/811/
"Since its 2001 launch, CBIM has been transformed from an awareness campaign into a comprehensive violence prevention curriculum for coaches and their athletes. The Coaching Boys into Men leadership program equips athletic coaches with strategies, scenarios, and resources needed to build attitudes and behaviors that prevent relationship abuse, harassment, and sexual assault."

NorthIslander
248
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NorthIslander 10/15/12 - 01:18 pm
5
3

Live a little

People are taking this the wrong way. It was for a good cause. Don't act like you have never tried on a pair of heels at least ONCE in your life.

Keep your ignorant comments to yourself and sign OFF once in a while.

kpawsuh
10138
Points
kpawsuh 10/15/12 - 01:43 pm
4
4

If you have been around

If you have been around abusive people, and unfortunately I have encountered several, they are not the type to care what you want. if you speak up, they are just as likely to kick the tar out of you. The only thing that I have seen work is shooting the SOB. When the women do get the nerve to speak up, they are thrown under the bus by the "justice system" or they try to move and live the rest of their lives in fear that he will find them. Events like this have no impact. The ones who would never dream of being abusive will show up and have a fun day. Thats it. Until the "Justice" system gets serious about putting these jerks away for a long time, they are more of a hinderance than anything.

ken dunker II
3341
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ken dunker II 10/15/12 - 02:13 pm
2
1

I would be more impressed if the guys kept the heels on

for a week. (Yes, at work too, wouldn't that make a statement for solidarity.)

J. E. Fume
5002
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J. E. Fume 10/15/12 - 03:34 pm
4
3

I see the point of the "bah

I see the point of the "bah humbug"-folks who have posted here. The kinds of guys who participate in these kinds of events, or even pay attention to them, are not the kinds of guys who kick the $h!t their old ladies on a regular basis.

Okay, some people had some fun and everybody got a lot of laughs. A few people can pat themselves on the back for a job well done. Nonetheless, I doubt if the whole event saved a single woman anywhere in the state from getting her ass kicked by her old man.

juneauakgrrl
711
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juneauakgrrl 10/15/12 - 04:26 pm
4
3

TWO THUMBS UP!!!!

TWO THUMBS UP!!!!

swimmergirl
4368
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swimmergirl 10/15/12 - 04:29 pm
1
4

kpawsuh and J.E.

yeah, you're right - it's hard to do anything, so let's just do nothing - - now there's a helpful attitude......

Again - there were YOUNG people involved. Maybe some kid who's dad hits his mom came because he was on the team and his friends went - and he breaks the cycle.

Think positive, boys. Be the change you want to see in the world.

Latitude58
14400
Points
Latitude58 10/15/12 - 06:25 pm
0
0

There are two men...

...in the situation:

The coward who beats up women. And the guy who steps in and stops the coward.

This event was for grooming the latter.

J. E. Fume
5002
Points
J. E. Fume 10/15/12 - 09:07 pm
3
0

Golly, I feel chastised. I'm

Golly, I feel chastised. I'm still not convinced that this whole event will do any good. However, I admit that it probably won't do any harm.

JNUKara
8612
Points
JNUKara 10/16/12 - 08:35 am
5
0

FYI, everyone, Vlad Altman is

FYI, everyone, Vlad Altman is my nephew. If you knew what kind of childhood he had and the problems he's facing in his life today, you would be shocked. I have no doubt that Matt, and this event, made a big impact on him. And I'm very proud of him for taking part. A year ago - he wouldn't have bothered to show up. This event did do some good - I'm grateful.

vallbay
1
Points
vallbay 10/16/12 - 11:22 am
3
4

Stop Violence

It's interesting that we have to continue to abash males to prove a point. I call it the continued pussification of our boys. Come on people, nobody wakes up in the morning and thinks, "I'm going to beat the crap out of my spouse/girlfriend/significant other!"
If you are a victim, get out of the relationship.
This goes along with not letting boys be boys, meaning, why can't young people play games anymore, unless it is supervised, like what passes for baseball for little kids, where there is no competition.
Males in the animal kingdom usurp their dominance by butting heads, fighting for their right to breed over the smaller male.
OK so as humans we are civilized, but there is no competition anymore.
What's next, taking away our hunting and fishing privileges?
Heaven forbid someone should get hurt, or worse, someones feelings get hurt because they lost.
While I, like several others, felt that this was a good way to bring up the problems of abuse, I was really disgusted with the whole idea.
And no, I never tried wearing high heels.

AKPatriot
784
Points
AKPatriot 10/16/12 - 02:39 pm
2
0

People should remember...

that there are also men who are abused by women...it's definitely not a one way street...but sadly these men don't report it, embarasment maybe, the bias against them maybe....and yes, I am a woman..regardless abuse is prevalent and it's never okay...

ken dunker II
3341
Points
ken dunker II 10/17/12 - 05:30 pm
1
1

kpawsuh: Your comments regarding the justice system throwing

women "under the bus", at least in Juneau, requires a response.
My personal experience in this area is limited. I do not know any woman being denied a haven at AWARE. I do not know a woman who is being physically abused. I do not know a woman, or man, in fear for their lives in a relationship.
But I should.
The numbers being touted suggest I must know one.
Despite my 5'7'' 145# frame I would intercede and more than likely be pummeled for my effort, or, if it is a neighbor be dealing with 'it' for the length of my residency.
Or I can call the police. Same scenario. (Small town, even smaller neighborhoods and the police do not share any 'privileged communication' restraints.)
What do I do?
Being a paralegal for twenty years I have seen both sides of the same coin, and, quite frankly, the woman is not being "thrown under the bus."
Not in Juneau. Not by our system. Not by our Judges.

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