Ideological paranoids

On a good weekend I'll club three or four baby seals; but I still think they should have let Greenpeace tie up their boat. The ideological paranoids down in Ketchikan evidently have a few brethren here in town. This is good because it makes my paper more interesting.

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I'm especially pleased to see the six U.S. marshals, from Homeland Security, assigned to shoot down any bunny-hugging troublemakers. I have to admit I was worried for awhile. I feel much safer now.

Greg Petrich

Juneau