In the age of the Me Too movement, Gillette has put out an advertisement that is surprisingly controversial. I was surprised at the response of some men to an ad that says we can be better, we can be kinder and it is the best of what is in us as men. To those men and to all men, I want to share something as I struggle and grow in this work:
To All of You Men Out There
I love you.
In all of your defensiveness. In all of your anger. In all of your uncertainty and second guessing of yourself.
I love you.
In your certainty that you’re a good guy. In your concern that you might be a bad guy. In all of your privilege. In all of your fear. In all of your hurt.
I love you.
I love you because I am one of you.
Defensive and angry. Competitive. Ambitious. Unsure. Lost. Closed in. Vulnerable. Strong. Broken.
I love you because I am one of you.
This is our work. This is not “women’s work.” These are not “women’s issues.” This is our work. Our work to listen for listening’s sake. To lift up women’s voices. To hear women’s voices. This is our work. To look inside. To recognize our biases. To strive to understand others. To have empathy for others. This does not make us less. This does not make us weak. In fact, this is not about us. Not everything is about us. This is our work, and it is a struggle.
I love you because this is hard for me.
I love you because this is a challenge. To see my privilege in all of its layers. To not to resent when it’s pointed out. To not to be defensive. To recognize my privilege and to use it. Use it to intervene for those that don’t have it. Use it to lift up others. Use it share and amplify the voices of others that are not heard.
I love you because this is my work too.
I have had help from amazing women and men in bringing me to, and guiding me in this work. Please feel free to contact me to discuss ways in which you can join in this work. richardc@awareak.org, or (907) 523-4942.
Richard Cole,
Juneau
• My Turns and Letters to the Editor represent the view of the author, not the view of the Juneau Empire.